Never Going to Happen
by Jey4eva
Summary: Well, here's my first L/J fic. Its like many other L/J fics..... Its sort of like James annoying Lily for no reason, y'know? And then in other chapters there's SERIOUS fighting. JUST READ IT! And review please!
1. Homework

A/N: Hey, what's up? There are like what? A gazillion stories about James and Lily...I just decided to add to that list...  
Right now, James and Lily are in their 6th year... and in their Potions class.  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own anything...(I still don't get why I have to do this since everyone knows that J.K. Rowling owns the whole thing).  
I do own Kendra, Ashley, and Emily though.  
  
Anyway, enjoy and R&R!  
  
It's Never Going to Happen  
By:Jey4eva  
  
Chapter 1: Homework  
  
"Yo Evans," James whispered.  
  
Lily rolled her eyes, "What?" She snapped, quietly.  
  
"Can I copy off of your Potions homework?" He asked, stealing a glance at the door... Professor Wesman wasn't there yet.  
  
"No!" Lily exclaimed. "Ask Sirius," she said.  
  
"Why not?" James asked. "And are you mad? Asking Sirius for homework...unbelievable."  
  
"I heard that," Sirius muttered in his sleep. He was drooling onto his desk, and snoring.  
  
Lily rolled her eyes, "Then ask Remus."  
  
"He's on the other side of the room!" James exclaimed. "C'mon Evans, please? You know what happens when we forget homework... Wesman goes ballistic." (A/N:is that spelled right?) James begged.  
  
"Potter, for once in your life, would you do your homework?" Lily grumbled, forking over her papers.  
  
"Thanks Evans," James said, grinning his dazzling smile.  
  
Lily rolled her eyes. James Potter was annoying her more than usual today...   
  
James finished copying her homework just as Wesman came into the classroom, "Thanks Evans, I owe ya' one," James said, winking.  
  
"Of course you do," she muttered, knowing that the next day he'd say the same thing when he asked for her homework.  
  
"Good morning students," Wesman said, turning to the class.  
  
"Good morning, Professor," everyone chorused.  
  
Sirius' head snapped up, "Good morning Professor!" He shouted, a little late.  
  
"Good morning Mr. Black, how was your hourly nap?" Wesman asked.  
  
Some Slytherins snickered.  
  
"It was just fine Professor," Sirius replied. "Thanks for asking."  
  
Wesman waved his hand to dismiss the subject. He picked up his wand and shouted, "Accio homework."  
  
Everyone's homework landed on a neat pile on top of his desk.  
  
He counted it and looked up, "Someone didn't do their homework," he announced. "Speak up while you can."  
  
Sirius loked very solemn, "It was me, Professor, I did it." He burst into mock tears, "I'm s-s-SORRY!"  
  
"Actually Mr. Black, for once, it isn't you," Wesman said brightly. "Is there anyone else that would like to speak up?"  
  
Severus Snape raised his hand, "It was me Professor."  
  
"May I have a reason?" Wesman asked.  
  
"Well, you see Professor, the reason I didn't do my homework is because I was studying really hard for the Potions quiz that you told us about... I was studying so hard, that I forgot all about the homework you assigned," Snape replied.  
  
"Liar," James hissed.  
  
"Very well, Mr. Snape, I'll expect it completed and handed in by tomorrow?" Wesman asked, buying the bogus story completely.  
  
"Oh my God, that bastard is actually getting off the hook," James whispered.  
  
Lily rolled her eyes overhearing him. "You didn't do your homework either, Potter."  
  
James shrugged, "Yes, but... Well, I'm cuter than he is..." he said.  
  
Lily was about to open her mouth to reply, but stole a glance at Snape.  
  
James' eyes brightened, "Go on, Evans. Tell me that you think that Snape is better looking than me."  
  
Lily shut her mouth not wanting to say that. Potter would probably tell Snape, Lily thought. And if she admitted that Potter was actually cuter than Snape, then she'd never live it down.  
  
"That was a stupid excuse anyway," Lily said before turning her attention back to Professor Wesman.  
  
* * *  
  
"Hey Lily!" A voice called.  
  
Lily whirled around and saw her friends Kendra Monroe, Ashley Burke, and Emily Banks.  
  
Kendra waved, "So what were you and James doing during Potions?" Kendra asked giggling.  
  
Lily shrugged, "The usual. The stupid git didn't have his homework, and asked to copy off of mine."  
  
Emily, who was a prefect gasped. "You didn't give it to him did you?"  
  
"Well, yes... I did. If I didn't then Wesman would take off points from Gryffindor," Lily said, looking uneasy. "Why Em?"  
  
"Cause' the teachers have decided to give detentions to the people that copy," Emily answered. "Professor McGonagall told me."  
  
"Its not starting today, is it Em?" Ashley asked, looking concerned.  
  
"Well, actually... Yes it did," Emily asked, sighing.  
  
"Well, look on the bright side, Lil'... You'll have detention with James Potter! The most cutest, sweetest, funniest, hottest-" Kendra started.  
  
"Stupidest, annoyingest, ugliest boy in the school," Lily said, cutting her off.  
  
"Awww, Lil' how can you say that? He's so sweet, and those dreamy eyes of his-" Kendra started.  
  
"Belong to the most stupidest, annoyingest-" Lily interrupted again.  
  
"Okay, we've gone over that already," Ashley cut in. "Over a hundred times."  
  
"More than a hundred," Emily added.  
  
Kendra giggled "If I didn't know better Lily, I'd say you had a crush on James."  
  
"But you don't know any better," Ashley said grinning.  
  
"So that means that you think she likes him!" Emily said in a sing-song voice.  
  
"And when I think someone likes someone... I play matchmaker and-" Kendra said, staring at James who was a few feet away laughing with Sirius, Remus, and Peter.  
  
"You wouldn't dare!" Lily declared, glaring at Kendra.  
  
"Hey James!" Kendra said, waving him over. "Lily-"  
  
Before she could utter a word, Lily put her hand over Kendra's mouth and dragged her away with Ashley and Emily giggling hysterically behind them.  
  
"What was that all about?" James muttered.  
  
Sirius, Remus, and Peter shrugged.  
  
"Let's play the rating game!" Sirius suggested.  
  
James and Remus grinned.  
  
"What's the rating game?" Peter asked.  
  
"Its a game where you rate girls that pass you by, on a scale of 1-10," Remus said.  
  
"Oh," Peter said.  
  
"Hey, Prongs, what do you think of Evans over there?" Sirius asked, nodding to her and her group of friends.  
  
"A nine," James replied smoothly. "She would be a ten if she'd lose that attitude of hers."  
  
"Awww, admit it Prongs, you love it," Remus replied.  
  
James looked shocked, "NEVER!" He cried.  
  
Sirius, Remus, and even Peter snickered.  
  
"Pr-Prongs, d-don't look now, but L-Lily is coming your way," Peter stuttered.   
  
James turned, "Evans..." he said slowly. "What's up?"  
  
"What's up?" She snapped. "What's up? I'll tell you what's up... You just got me in a detention with you." She said.  
  
"What?" James asked.  
  
"Yeah Potter, that's right. Didn't you hear? People get detentions when they copy off of homework," Lily said, icily.  
  
"Whoa! Evans, look I'm sorry, okay? I had no idea. I'll tell Professor Wesman to excuse you, okay? It'll be alright," James said, looking guilty.  
  
"Forget it, Potter," Lily snapped, and stalked away.  
  
"Ooh..." Sirius said.  
  
They snickered.  
  
"Oh shut up!" James said, and stared after Lily.  
  
A/N: So did you guys like the first chapter? I want a lot of NICE reviews if you don't mind...   
  
  



	2. So Full of Himself

A/N: Hey, so I'm a bit overwhelmed, I mean, I went to check my e-mail the day after I uploaded my story, and I got 35 e-mails! (30 were the reviews from everybody. I'd like to say 'thanks' to the people that reviewed.... "THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!" Okay, sorry, I went into another one of my 'weird stages' (read my bio, and you'll understand) Anyway, here's the second chapter.  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own anything.  
  
  
Never Going to Happen  
By: Jey4eva  
  
Chapter 2: So Full of Himself  
  
  
Lily's POV:  
  
Miss Lily Evans,  
So, you thought you wouldn't get caught, did you? Well, I proved you wrong. Copying or probably in your case, letting someone copy off your homework is wrong, and should be made illegal. You're just lucky that it isn't.   
As you must know by now, you have detention, along with Mr. Potter. I have made it my business to know that you and Mr. Potter aren't exactly the best of friends, so I am so HAPPY to tell you that you will be spending detention with him.   
Please report to my office at 11 o'clock sharp, tonight. If you don't know the way, ask Mr. Potter since he's been there countless times that he probably could walk there in his sleep.  
I hope your detention tonight makes you realize that copying or letting someone copy off homework is wrong.  
I'll expect you at my office EARLY.  
  
Sincerely,  
Thomas Wesman  
  
I sighed and put the letter down on the Gryffindor table.  
  
"Wow, just old parchment paper, huh?" Kendra asked. "I would have expected a Howler from Wesman, wouldn't you?"  
  
I shrugged along with Ashley and Emily.  
  
"Are you still upset, Lil'?" Ashley asked, patting her shoulder.  
  
"I'm not upset, I'm furious!" I burst out.  
  
Everyone jumped at my outburst.  
  
I slammed my fist on the table, "I'm sick and tired of that good-for-nothing-Potter, always getting me in trouble."  
  
"Aw! C'mon Lil', he doesn't mean it," Emily said soothingly.  
  
"Besides, you can't be mad at him!" Kendra added. "He's too cute."  
  
"Kendra!" Ashley hissed.  
  
"What?" Kendra asked. "What?"  
  
I shook my head, "He's just so- UGH!"  
  
"I still think that you like him. But, I can't blame you. James is really cute," Kendra said.  
  
"Stop obsessing over him!" I exclaimed. "Its unwitch-like."  
  
"I'm not obsessed over James, Lily," Kendra said. "I'm obsessed with that 7th year over there," she said nodding her head across the Gryffindor table to a 7th year boy.  
  
"Oh... I forget his name..." Emily trailed off.  
  
"Could you please, focus?" I asked, exasperated.  
  
"Sorry, Lil'," Emily said.  
  
I sighed and stared at Wesman's letter. "Argh!" I exclaimed and grabbed the letter angrily. I picked up my wand to set it on fire but someone grabbed my arm before I could utter the spell.   
"Really Evans, you have to learn how to relax," James whispered in my ear.  
  
Emily gasped when she glanced behind me.  
  
Ashley pursed her lips.  
  
Kendra grinned.  
  
I flung his hand off.  
  
"Is this seat taken?" James asked puting a hand on the chair next to me.  
  
"Mind if we have a share of the ladies, James?" Sirius Black's voice boomed in.  
  
James looked at me expectantly.  
  
I rolled my eyes, "Sure," I said sarcastically. "Sit down, take a seat. Have a hell of a time!"  
  
James rolled his eyes as he sat down. He grabbed my crumpled up letter. "Are you always this aggresive?" He asked. He uncrumpled the letter and started reading the letter.  
  
"Give that to me!" I demanded.  
  
"Oh, I can't Evans. Since I'm a no good bloody- What was the word you were going to use after that?" James asked smiling. 'Well, anyway, I can't because then I'm going to be giving you my no good bloody germs."  
  
"Really, Potter, could you ever for once in your life be serious?" I asked.  
  
"But I'm Sirius!" Sirius cried.  
  
Remus laughed.  
  
A second later Peter laughed too, "I get it!" He cried.  
  
"You heard him, he's Sirius, there can't be two Siriuses," James said, grinning.  
  
"Oh, shut up! You know what I mean," I snapped.  
  
"Oh Lily, give them a break," Kendra said.  
  
"Well, who's this?" James asked raising his eyebrows at her approvingly.  
  
I rolled my eyes.  
  
"Hi! I'm Kendra, this is Ashley and Emily," Kendra said smiling happily since she was finally noticed.  
  
"I'm James, and this is Sirius, Remus, and Peter," James said.  
  
"We know," the three of them chorused.  
  
  
  
James' POV:  
I glanced at Lily who was looking furious. She felt me staring and turned to glare at me.  
  
"Evans, why are you so upset?" I asked.  
  
"What do you mean?" Lily snapped.  
  
"I mean, I've gotten you in trouble loads of times, but this is the only time where you've actually been mad at me," I said.  
  
"Its a new thing for you, isn't it?" Lily snapped.  
  
"Nooo....," I said cautiously. "Well, yeah... I mean, NO! I mean.... maybe."  
  
She raised an eyebrow at me waiting for me to finish.  
  
"I'm just saying that detention is no big deal..." I trailed off.  
  
"No big deal?" Lily asked shocked. "No big DEAL?! How can you say that?" She cried.  
  
I shrugged helplessly.  
  
"This ruins my reputation with all the teachers and-"  
  
"What might that reputation be?" I asked, cocking my head.  
  
"Shut up!" She said.  
  
"What?" I asked. "What'd I say?"  
  
She groaned, "You're just so-so-so..."  
  
"Smart? Cute? Friendly? Nice? Hot?" I supplied.  
  
She glared, "You're so full of yourself that it's sick," she snapped and stalked out of the Great Hall.  
  
"Ooh," Kendra said.  
  
Ashley and Emily nodded.  
  
"James, you're just too much," Sirius said slapping my back. He and Remus were cracking up on the floor. Peter was sitting there looking confused.  
  
"How's this funny?" He asked, cocking his head.  
  
I shrugged and glanced at my watch, it was 8 o'clock.... 3 more hours.... I sighed, thinking of what Lily said. Was she right? Was I really full of myself?  
  
  
  
  
A/N: I think this chapter was sort of boring, but the next chapter's going to be about the 'exciting detention'. Okay, well please review!  
  
~Jey4eva~  



	3. Detention

A/N: Hey! Here's the 3rd Chapter...hope you like it. Thanks for everyone that reviewed. R&R!  
  
Disclaimer: I used the name "Bombur" and J.R. Tolkien used that name for dwarf in his book "The Hobbit". I DON'T OWN ANYTHING! EVERYONE GET IT STRAIGHT! EVERYTHING BELONGS TO J.K. ROWLING!!!!!!!!  
alright then, on with the story.  
  
Never Going to Happen  
By: Jey4eva  
  
Chapter 3: Detention  
  
  
Lily's POV:  
I sighed and pocketed my wand.  
  
"Bye Lily!" Kendra, Ashley, and Emily shouted.  
  
"Be careful," Emily warned. "Wesman will probably pick a horrible detention for you and James."  
  
"Being in the same room with him will be enough," Ashley giggle.  
  
I smiled wanly. I walked out of our dorm waving, "Wish me luck!" I said.  
  
"Good luck," they added.  
  
"Have fun!" Kendra said in a sing-song voice.  
  
"Ugh!" Was my reply.  
  
I walked down to the Common Room. I looked around, sensing another prescence, "Potter," I croaked.  
  
  
  
James's POV:  
I cleaned my eye glasses with my robes.  
  
"Potter," I heard.  
  
I jumped and put my glasses on. Who would be up at a time like this? I took out my wand ready to fight. "Who's there?" I whispered.  
  
I heard heels clicking closer to me.  
  
"I'm warning you," I said softly. "I know how to duel, so don't come any further."  
  
The clicking continued.  
  
"Potter, you're such a dork," the same voice whispered.  
  
"Evans?" I asked.  
  
"Yeah, yeah, its me," she said. She appeared out of the darkness. She rolled her eyes. "Really Potter. Would you put that down before you kill someone?" She snapped.  
  
"Don't do that!" I whispered. "I thought you were..."  
  
She rolled her eyes again, "How did you know it was me?" She asked.  
  
"Your sarcasm," I muttered.  
  
She glared, then glanced at her watch, "Do you know how to get to Wesman's office?"  
  
"Relax Evans," I said. "He's probably going to be late, so there's no need to be early."  
  
"But, he's going to expect me early," she whispered. "I have to be there."  
  
"Believe me Evans, he won't care if you show up an hour late. I've been in detention with him so many times, that I lost count at 138," I said, reassuringly.  
  
"I don't care," she said. "I just want to be there. Just tell me how to get there, and I'll go," she said.  
  
"Aw, c'mon Evans, just take a seat," I said, putting my hands on her shoulders and putting her in a chair. "And wait for awhile."  
  
"But-" she started.  
  
"Jeez Evans," I muttered. "Just sit." I leaned against a wall and stared into the darkness. She was silent for awhile.  
  
"I don't see how you can actually WAIT for yourself to be late, and yelled at," she whispered furiously. "Well, I won't do it with you." She got up. "I'll find his office on my own," she said and walked away.  
  
I waited for a minute, thinking of what she just said. She was right... Wesman would probably yell at me and I'd get another detention. I sighed, and ran after her. I caught up with her right when she was about to take a wrong turn to McGonagall's office.  
  
"Evans," I whispered.  
  
She turned around in fright. Seeeing that it was me, she relaxed. So you've decided to come along, have you?" She asked.  
  
"Yeah, I'm coming. You're going to need my help anyway. That's to McGonagall's office," I said.  
  
"Only you would know," she said.  
  
I ignored her. "This way," I said quietly, turning the other way.  
  
After a good 5 mintues, we were at Wesman's office.  
  
"Apparate," I said loudly.  
  
swung open, and we walked into a dimly lighted room.  
  
"Potter, are you sure that this is-" Lily started.  
  
"Ah, Mr. Potter and Miss Evans, it's about time," Wesman said.  
  
We turned and saw Wesman in his chair, hands together, as if in prayer.  
  
"So, what's the detention you have for us today, Professor?" I asked brightly.  
  
Wesman sneered at me, "Sit," he ordered.  
  
Lily and I sat down in chairs in front of Wesman's desk.  
  
Wesman glared at us, especially at me, "What you two did today was very worng," he said gravely. "And everything has its consequences."  
  
No shit Einstein, I thought. I sighed and rolled my eyes. I leaned back in my chair and tuned Wesman out. I had heard this stupid speech everytime I had gotten detention with Wesman.  
  
"Potter!" Wesman snapped.  
  
"What?" I asked.  
  
"Pay attention," he snarled.  
  
I rolled my eyes and sat up.  
  
"Your detention today is going to be cleaning the dishes," Wesman said.  
  
I pursed my lips to keep from grinning. This would be a easy. I'd just use a cleaning spell, piece of-  
  
"Without magic," Wesman said cut in. He held out his hand, "Hand over your wands," he barked.  
  
Lily silently handed him her wand.  
  
Wesman turned to me, eyebrow raised, "Potter?" He asked, challengingly.  
  
I sighed and handed him my wand. He put our wands in a drawer in his desk.  
  
"Follow me," he said, and led us out of his office.  
  
I rolled my eyes and followed him to the kitchen.  
  
"In," he ordered.  
  
I let Lily in first.  
  
  
  
Lily's POV:  
I walked into the kitchen happily. This detention would be a breeze. I did enough dishwashing at home when Petunia didn't do her chores, and I got stuck doing them.  
  
I looked around the brightly lighted room. There were house elves scattered everywhere. James entered the room, nose wrinkling. Wesman glared at the house elves.  
  
"I told you already,"he snapped. "Its your night off. These young people will wash the dishes tonight."  
  
"But sir," one squeaked. "We can do it."  
  
"Yes," the others agreed.  
  
I stared at them amused. I still didn't understand why house elves liked to work.  
  
James looked pleadingly to Wesman. Wesman ignored them.  
  
"No!" He exclaimed. He clapped his hands, "Out!" He shouted. "Out!" He chased the elves out to another room.  
  
James covered his mouth to hide his laughter.  
  
I pursed my lips to keep from laughing with him. Wesman came back composed. "What are you standing there for?" He snapped. "Get to work!"  
  
James stood upright, "Yes, sir!" He saluted.  
  
Wesman rolled his eyes, "I'm warning you, Potter," he said, glaring at him.  
  
He stalked out of the kitchen.  
  
I looked around searching for the sink. When I found it and saw what was in it my mouth dropped open. There must have been over a thousand dishes there. But that wasn't the only sink, there was another one, and another one.... There were 5 sinks in all.  
  
"Damn," James said under his breath.  
  
I gave a small groan and stomped over to the first sink. I started washing the dishes. James just stood there. I rolled my eyes, "Potter, what are you doing just standing there?" I asked. "Get to work! I can't do this on my own!"  
  
He mumbled something.  
  
"What?!" I asked.  
  
"I don't know how to wash dishes the Muggle way," he muttered.  
  
I stood silent for a moment then burst out laughing.  
  
"Its not funny!" He defended himself.  
  
"Yes it is!" I said. "Why-why didn't you just say so?" I asked in between laughter.  
  
He glared at me, and crossed his arms. "Are you just going to stand there laughing or are you going to show me how to do it?" He asked.  
  
I calmed down and taught him how to wash.  
  
"Grab a pair of gloves over there," I said, pointing to rubber gloves that her hanging on a rack.  
  
"These?" He asked.  
  
"Yeah, put them on," I said.  
  
He held up his hands a minute later. "Like this?" He asked.  
  
I burst out laughing all over again.  
  
"What is it now?" He asked miserably.  
  
"They're on inside out," I said, gasping for breath.  
  
After another minute went by, James finally had the gloves on right.  
  
"Now whatdya do?" he asked.  
  
I looked around for another sponge. "Here," I said handing it to him.  
  
He grabbed it.  
  
"Here, watch me," I said. I started washing a plate, making circular motions with the sponge onto the plate. "You have to make sure that its clean," I told him.  
  
He was watching intently.  
  
"I think this is enchanted to just have more soap come out when it needs more," I told him.  
  
"Soap?" He asked faintly.  
  
"Yeah, this bubbly stuff," I said, nodding.  
  
He looked lost.  
  
I rolled my eyes, "Potter, I really think you need to take Muggle Studies."  
  
He shrugged.  
  
"So, anyway, when you're done that then I guess you just stick it in the dish washer," I said, and put it in the dish washer.  
  
"The dish washer," he repeated.  
  
"Yeah," I said.  
  
"Okay, um... Okay," he said, and went to the second sink next to me.  
  
We started working silently. Then...  
  
CRASH!!!  
  
I jumped and looked up. James was staring down at the ground.  
  
"Shit," he muttered.  
  
"What the hell?" I asked and stared down. There was a shattered plate on the ground.  
  
A house elf appeared from behind a corner. "Is there a problem young James and Lily Potter?" He asked.  
  
"Uh, yeah," I said. I pointed.  
  
The house elf stared at it for a minute then raised his fist and hit himself on the head.  
  
I sighed, then thought of what he said, "Wait a minute, what did you mean when you said James and Lily Potter? My last name is Evans."  
  
The elf didin't answer.  
  
James looked at his watch as the house elf continually did this.  
  
He finally stopped and he spoke, "Bombur will fix it," and he picked up the pieces and without another word or glance walked away.  
  
"But-" I said. I looked at James. It seemed like he handn't heard me either...  
  
We stared at eachother and shrugged.  
  
"Can you show me again?" He asked. "Cause'...I don't know if I'm doing it right..."  
  
I nodded and walked towards him.  
  
  
James's POV:  
Lily walked towards me. She put her hands on my arms and started moving my arm in circular motions around the plate. Her touch felt so warm...  
  
"Make sure you've got a tight grip on it, okay Potter?" She asked.  
  
I sighed, if only she would stop calling me Potter... Of course, I was calling her Evans...  
  
I turned to look at her as she continued to dictate things on how to wash the dishes. She looked really pretty...  
  
  
  
Lily's POV:  
I stopped and took a breath. James was silent and I turned to look at him.  
  
He was staring at me in gaze like way.  
  
"Potter? What are you doing?" I asked softly.  
  
He didn't answer. Our faces were just a few inches apart. He leaned in closer to me. We kissed-just for a second... Then-  
  
I pushed him away, "Potter!" I exclaimed.  
  
James looked sheepish, "Sorry Evans, something came over me."  
  
I rolled my eyes and walked back to the first sink. I could still feel his lips on mine. I smiled in spite of myself...  
  
  
A/N: What do you think? Too early? Well, the story's going to have a twist in the next chapter. If you wanna see the next chapter, REVIEW!!! 


	4. The Crazy Twist

A/N: Maybe the kiss was a LITTLE too early, but oh well... Like I said, the story's going to have a twist... So here it is... R&R!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything!  
  
  
Never Going to Happen  
By: Jey4eva  
  
Chapter 4: The Crazy Twist (of this spectacular story...hehe, right)  
  
  
James's POV:  
"So Prongs, how was your detention with Lily last night?" Sirius asked me, teasingly. "Anything... I dunno, happen?"  
  
"Don't start," I warned. I flexed my arm and winced painfully. "You won't believe how hard it is to wash dishes the Muggle way! I don't know how Muggles can stand it!"  
  
Remus yawned loudly. He was reading his Transfiguration book... No wonder.  
  
We were in the Gryffindor Common Room early that morning. Breakfast wasn't being served yet, so the whole mottly (A/N: is that spelled right? Oh whatever.) crew was hanging out in the Common Room.  
  
"Here comes that friend of Lily's," Sirius whispered.  
  
"Who?" I inquired, not remembering any of her friends.  
  
"That cute brunette. Tall, talkative, attractive..." Sirius said emphasizing the word 'attractive'.  
  
"What?" I asked wrinkling my nose. "You fancy one of Lily's friends?"  
  
Sirius shook his head, "No... I rather go for blonds."  
  
I turned around and saw a sleepy looking brunette. She caught me looking and smiled brightly.  
  
"Well, Padfoot, if you don't fancy her, then I guess I should just go over there and ask her out... What do you think Moony?" I asked, looking over at Remus who was stretching sleepily in his chair.  
  
He shrugged, "Whatever James... I just thought you were going to go for Lily."  
  
I made a face, "Don't bring that up again," I said. "You know it isn't true."  
  
Remus shrugged again, "Then I say 'go for it'." He yawned sleepily.  
  
"Alright then," I said getting up and crossing to the chair she was slouching in.  
  
She straightened when she saw me. She smiled brushing a lock of hair off her face, "Hi James," she said breathlessly.  
  
"Hi-er..." I trailed off.  
  
"Kendra," she said. "Kendra Monroe."  
  
I stuck out my hand, "Hi there Kendra."  
  
She shook it with ease.  
  
"So, you're one of Lily's friends aren't you?" I asked, making conversation.  
  
She nodded.  
  
"Yeah, well, um- I was wondering..." I trailed off slowly. "Would you like to go to Hogsmeade with me?"  
  
Her eyes lit up with surprise. "Sure James!" She exclaimed. "Should I ask Professor McGonagall if we could go?"  
  
I chuckled softly, "Who said anything about asking McGonagall?"  
  
She frowned, "Then how do you expect us to get to Hogsmeade?"  
  
"You'll find out," I told her. "I'll meet you here at the common room tomorrow?" I asked.  
  
She nodded, still frowning, "Okay."  
  
"Great," I said grinning and walking away. I walked to Sirius, Remus, and Peter.  
  
"Hey hey!" Sirius said, giving me a thumbs up sign. Remus gave his usual grin.  
  
"Well, James, I guess you do have guts," Remus said, with an amused smile on his face.  
  
"Yes Moony, I know," I said looking at my nails boredly. "EVERYONE knows that. Maybe I could give you a few pointers..."  
  
"I don't think so," Remus said looking over my shoulder.  
  
Sirius looked over my shoulder then covered his mouth to muffle his laughs. "Ooh James!" Sirius started, but then keeled over in laughter.  
  
"What?" I demanded and turned. My mouth almost dropped open. Lily was standing at the steps, staring calmly at me as Kendra babbled away next to her. "Oh shit," I muttered.  
  
  
  
Lily's POV:  
"And so, guess what Lily!" Kendra exclaimed.  
  
"What?" I asked, miserably.  
  
"He asked me out!" She practically screamed in my ear.  
  
"Who?" I asked faintly.  
  
Kendra rolled her eyes, "James, Lily, James."  
  
"That's nice," I said nodding. I gave a fake yawn, "Well, goodnight Kendra."  
  
Kendra frowned, "Lily, its 8 in the morning."  
  
"Oh," I said suddenly. "They'll be serving breakfast now," I said. I turned and walked out the portrait hole. (A/N: Actually, I don't know the exact time that they serve breakfast, but bare with me.)  
  
"Oh thanks! Don't wait for me!" Kendra called.  
  
I barely heard her. It was like I was in my own world. James Potter, the one that I absoulutely LOATHE, had asked my friend on a date... Right after last night... Did a kiss mean ANYTHING to HIM?! "That ass hole. I can't BELIEVE I actually kissed the idiot!" I muttered to myself as I made my way to the Great Hall.  
  
  
  
James's POV:  
"I don't see why you care, Prongs," Sirius said lightly.  
  
Remus nodded, "You said so yourself, 'you don't give a rat's ass about Lily... No offense Wormtail," Remus said turning to Peter.  
  
Peter snored in reply.  
  
"That was last year," I said defensively.  
  
"You said yesterday that-" Remus started.  
  
"Did you remember EVERYTHING I said about Lily?" I asked, exasperated. "Last night, during detention..."  
  
"You two snogged?" Sirius asked excitedly.  
  
"You're calling her LILY?" Remus exclaimed at the same time.  
  
"Nooo!" I said hotly. "We did not snog, we just well, became closer..."  
  
"You do know how missleading that sounds, right James?" Remus said, grinning.  
  
"Shut up," I said.  
  
Sirius and Remus gave eachother high fives as they burst into laughter.  
  
"I just... I don't need Evans pissed off at me... Its distracting," I said slowly.  
  
"And we're back to Evans," Remus muttered.  
  
"She looks cute when she's pissed off, doesn't she Prongs?" Sirius teased.  
  
"Would you stop that?" I demanded. I sighed and slouched in my chair. "I'm going to breakfast," I announced and walked out the portrait hole.  
  
  
  
Lily's POV:  
"Then he said 'Kendra, I think you're so hot... Would you marry me?' Of course, he quickly corrected himself saying 'I mean, would you like to go to Hogsmeade with me.' But, he didn't do it quickly enough for me to miss the 'will you marry me'," Kendra told the Gryffindor girls.  
  
They all burst into a fit of giggles.  
  
I rolled my eyes and moved my scrambled eggs with my fork around the plate. My head was on my hand and I was staring down.  
  
"Lily, are you listening?" Kendra demanded.  
  
"Yes Kendra, I've listened to the story for about the millionth time," I mumbled, not looking up.  
  
"Tell us again Kendra!" A first year girl said.  
  
"No," I muttered. "No more."  
  
Ashley and Emily gave me sympathetic smiles.  
  
I sat up suddenly and stood up.  
  
"Where are you going Lily?" Kendra asked surprised. "You have to listen about my story of how James asked me out."  
  
"I've heard it," I muttered and walked away.   
  
Stupid girl, I thought to myself. Doing this to yourself because a BOY had kissed you and then the next day asked your friend out. And of all boys... it had to be JAMES POTTER!  
  
"You are NOT going to let James Potter run you like this," I said under my breath. "He's beneath you, he's scum, he's NOTHING!" I ranted on as I stalked to the Gryffindor tower.  
  
I was muttering these exact same words when, who to thought... I bumped into Mr. Scum himself.  
  
"Watch it!" I snapped looking up, but down (A/N: If you get what I mean.) thinking it was a younger student. But seeing feet, I looked up seeing James smirking down at me.  
  
"Having a bad day Evans?" James asked amused.  
  
Oh God, how I just wanted to kiss him, but at the same time wipe that smirk off his face....  
  
  
A/N: Yup yup yup... I'm leaving it there. You guys are lucky... At least I didn't wait TOO long before posting this chapter... (But it was pretty long.) But anyway, I'm bad at cliffhangers... Everyone says that. But, I happen to like this cliffhanger cause' I just do... You guys are probably loving it too... (yeah, right) but, for those of you that want to find out what happens next in the 2nd part of "The Crazy Twist" (cause' there's more to come).... REVIEW!!! 


	5. The Crazy Twist: Part 2

A/N: Hey! So, I was suffering from writer's block on all my other stories, so then I decided to upload my L/J story (not that I see that you all would care...but anyways...) And I dunno if this is as big of a 'Crazy Twist' as I thought...oh well. R&R!!!!  
  
Disclaimer: I own no one...and I'm getting sick and tired of typing this. I mean only an idiot wouldn't know that J.K. Rowling owns the characters.  
  
Never Going to Happen  
By: Jey4eva  
  
Chapter 5: The Crazy Twist: Part 2  
  
Lily's POV:  
I glared at James stonily and walked past him.  
  
"What'd I say?" He asked, grabbing my arm.  
  
I wrenched my arm out of his grasp , "Don't touch me!" I shreiked, my voice amazingly high.  
  
He frowned, "Evans, I really think you have problems... What's with you?"  
  
"As if you don't know!" I exclaimed.  
  
"Nooo... I don't know... But I wish you would tell me," James replied.  
  
I stood there glaring at him and thinking of my reply.  
  
He stood there, arms crossed, leaning against the stone wall, an amused smile on his face.  
  
My eyes narrowed, oh God... EVERYTHING amuses him. NOTHING makes him turn serious... Just for once.... UGH! God I was so angry that I could scream!  
  
"You want to know what my problem is?" I asked, hoarsley.  
  
James leaned in interestedly, "Yes, what is it?"  
  
I took a deep breath.  
  
  
  
James's POV:  
God, this outta be good... I thought to myself. I couldn't help noticing that Lily smelled like roses... I shook my head, ugh, stop this JAMES!  
  
"My problem is you, James Potter. It has and always WILL be YOU," Lily said calmly.  
  
"What?" I asked, frowning. Did she just say that her problem was ME! I, James Potter... Everyone's favorite guy was somebody's PROBLEM!!!  
  
"Yes," Lily said, still in her calm voice. "Every bloody day all I can think of is you. Just you. You you you you YOU! And you wanna know what else, Potter?" She asked, leaning in closer to me.  
  
Maybe me being her problem wasn't so bad after all, I thought.  
  
"What?" I whispered.  
  
"I'm sick of it," she said, menace in her voice.  
  
"You're-what?" I asked.  
  
"I said 'I'm sick' of your face in my head every second of the day. I'm sick of your annoying smile. I'm sick of the fact that just last night I KISSED YOU! And not only do you treat it as nothing, but you go ahead and ask my best friend out! God, Potter! If I was the last woman on Earth, the last man on Earth would definetley NOT be you." Lily finished and exhaled slowly. Her face was slightly pink from her outburst.  
  
I stared at her in shock. He red hair was in disarray. Her green eyes were burning with green flames. Her lips were slightly parted as she was trying to catch her breath.  
  
I still continued to stare at her as she started to grow impatient for my reply.  
  
"Aren't you going to say anything?" She demanded.  
  
I shook my head, unable to come up with a come back.  
  
She rolled her eyes and stomped up to the Gryffindor Common Room.  
  
I stared after her.  
  
Lily Evans had just told me that she was sick of me. TO MY FACE! Was that possible?  
  
Was it possible for me to actually LIKE that scene that we just had over there?!!!!  
  
I sighed... Lily Evans was different... VERY different from all the other girls...  
  
  
  
Lily's POV:  
"Oh God, I can't believe I just said that to James Potter," I muttered under my breath.   
  
Girls that were in love in him (which was the whole population of females in the school) were probably already plotting to murder me for hurting ickle' Jamesie's feelings. I rolled my eyes. Well I wasn't sorry for what I said. James deserved it for being such a bastard... He was a thick-headed ass hole.  
  
I sighed and flipped over to my back on my bed.  
  
A bang came from the door. I sat up to see Kendra, Ashley, and Emily rush to me with concerned looks on their faces.  
  
"Lily!" They exclaimed.  
  
"Everyone's talking about you and James!" Kendra said excitedly. "Is it true that you two kissed last night during detention?"  
  
I moaned.  
  
"What did you do to him?" Ashley asked. "Everyone's saying that you hit him... HARD."  
  
"You better not go to lunch or dinner or come out at all!" Emily exclaimed. "Some girls are plotting to kill you... Or at least try..." Emily said with a wry smile.  
  
"Ugh! What'd I do? All I did was tell James what I thought about him," I said.  
  
"What do you think about him?" Ashley asked.  
  
"Its not what you're thinking," I said, giving a sharp look at Kendra, who I knew would spread the word the moment she got details.  
  
"Well? What then?" Kendra asked, tapping ehr foot impatiently and crossing ehr arms.  
  
"To summarize it all, I just told him that I hated his guts," I replied.  
  
"Well, what about the kiss?" Kendra asked.  
  
"That's none of your business," I said.  
  
Kendra raised an eyebrow, "James is saying that you two snogged the whole night."  
  
"Why that no-good, backstabbing, lying bastard!" I exclaimed.  
  
"Jeez Lily... You seem really pissed off," Emily said. "What are you so mad about?"  
  
I sighed, "Never mind." I got off my bed and looked at the mirror.  
  
The mirror tsk-tsked at my messed up hair.  
  
I grabbed a hair brush and began to tug at the tangles. I applied lipstick and nodded in satisfaction. I went to the door and opened it.  
  
"Where are you going?" Emily asked.  
  
"Out," I replied. "C'mon! I need body guards!"  
  
They laughed and ran to catch up with me.  
  
  
James's POV:  
"What happened then James?" A 4th year girl breathed.  
  
I glanced out of the corner of my eye at Sirius, Remus, and Peter. I grinned.  
  
Sirius grinned, "Yes Jamesie- What happened then?" He asked in a high, girlish voice.  
  
Remus snickered.  
  
Peter looked confused.  
  
"Well, then Evans... Being the mean one that she is told me that-" I started.  
  
"I told you that you were the most annoying ass hole/bastard/jackass/anything else that anyone can come up with," a voice said coldly.  
  
Everyone turned and gasped.  
  
I looked up and smiled brightly, "Evans!" I said brightly. "So glad you could make it to the party!"  
  
"Go to hell, Potter," she said and turned and went through the portrait hole.  
  
Ashley and Emily followed her.  
  
Kendra stayed behind, "Ummm... we're still on for tomorrow, right?" She asked.  
  
I nodded, smiling, "Sure."  
  
Girls shot murder looks at her retreating back as she followed her friends.  
  
"Damn, James... You got Lily really mad," Remus observed.  
  
"You just noticed?" I asked, sarcastically.  
  
  
A/N: Well, there you have it! Chapter 5! Whoo! I especially liked this one... It was COOL!!!!!!! So please review! Please please please!!!! Don't make me beg! (I just begged, but whatever.) 


	6. The Date and some more Fighting

A/N: Okay, so here's the 6th Chapter... There's not much to say... Okay, so read it!  
  
Disclaimer: Most of the characters belong to the great J.K. Rowling.  
  
  
Never Going to Happen  
By: Jey4eva  
  
Chapter 6: The Date and some more Fighting  
  
Lily's POV:  
"Oh my God! I've been studying all my robes and have discovered that I have nothing to wear!" Kendra shrieked peering out at us from behind her closet.  
  
Ashley and Julie shrugged.  
  
I just popped my bubblegum. I was lying down on my back and staring up into space... Trying to block out Kendra's complains... But I could still hear her wails even though I had a sound blocker surrounding me. I sighed and got out my wand and did the reverse spell. Now I could hear clearer.  
  
"What do you think? I've narrowed it down to 2 choices. Okay, either I cancel the date or... I cancel the date," Kendra said. She smiled brightly, "Which one?"  
  
Ashley and Emily immediately tried consoling her.  
  
"Oh no, Ken. He'll think you're pretty no matter what you wear," Emily said.  
  
Ashley nodded, "And besides, he asked you out when you were wearing your red robes, so why don't you use that one?"  
  
Kendra groaned. She turned to me, "Well Lily? Aren't YOU going to say anything?"  
  
I ignored her and began filing my nails.  
  
"Lily?" Kendra asked walking towards my bed.  
  
I pretended not to hear her.  
  
"Lily?" Kendra said a little louder this time.  
  
I yawned and resumed filing my nails.  
  
"LILY!" Kendra practically shouted in my ear.  
  
I turned as if finally hearing her, "Huh?" I asked innocently.  
  
Kendra rolled her eyes.  
  
Ashley and Emily giggled.  
  
Kendra sagged onto my bed, "My life is over!" She moaned.  
  
"Uh huh," I said. I put aside my nail filer, and grabbed my magazine. I began flipping through the pages.  
  
Kendra sighed. her eyes travelled around the room then stopped at my closet, "That's it!" She exclaimed softly.  
  
I yawned again.  
  
Kendra grabbed me by the shoulders, "Lily!"  
  
"Kendra," I replied, calmly.  
  
"I need you to do me a favor," Kendra said.  
  
"What?" I asked.  
  
"I need you to let me borrow your white robes. You know, the one with the lace and everything?" Kendra asked.  
  
I opened my mouth to protest.  
  
"I promise not to get it dirty. It will be returned to you intact," Kendra reassured me.  
  
"Yes, well what about the time you used my red robes with glitters? Remeber what happened to that?" I asked.  
  
"I payed you back!" Kendra said defensivley.   
  
"But I wasn't able to get the same robe," I replied. "And I really like that white robe. Its the only robe that actually looks GOOD on me."  
  
Now it was my turn to be consoled.  
  
"Awww... Lily, that's not true," Ashley said.  
  
"Yeah, Lil', what about that satin blue dress gown?" Emily asked.  
  
"Or that deep emerald one?" Ashley added.  
  
"Or that-"  
  
"Never mind! Forget I said it!" I snapped. I was secretly pleased... So I don't look as horrible as I think... I thought. So James has no reason to think I'm ugly... So cross off #3495 on "Reasons Why Potter Would Treat Our Kiss As Nothing".  
  
I groaned and stuffed my face in my hands. I pulled my knees up to my chin.  
  
"What is it, Lily?" Ashley asked, concerned.  
  
"Nothing," I muttered.  
  
"Hello?" Kendra demanded. "I'm still patiently waiting."  
  
I shook my head as I raised my head to meet her eyes, "NO!" I said.  
  
Kendra pouted, "Please?" She asked, giving me her puppy dog eyes.  
  
"No no no," I said shaking my head.  
  
"But c'mon Lily, I-" Kendra started.  
  
"La la la la la!" I shouted, covering my ears with my ears.  
  
"Lily!" Kendra cried.  
  
I dropped my hands, "What?"  
  
"What's your problem today?" She asked, frowning. "Are you upset about something?"  
  
"No," I said, hotly.  
  
"Then what's the big deal in lending me your robes?!" Kendra shrieked.  
  
I shrugged, "I just don't wanna," I mumbled.  
  
"But why!" Kendra asked, exasperated. "I mean, I could put a charm on it so it wouldn't get any of James's germs or stains or"  
  
I was weakening... No matter how mad I was at Kendra... She had no clue... But I shouldn't be mad at her... She didn't do anything wrong... James did... the bastard.  
  
I sighed, "Okay," I said giving into Kendra's pleas.  
  
Kendra flung her arms around me in a huge hug, "Oh thank you Lily!" She cried. "You're the best!" She let go of me then ran to my closet flinging the doors open.  
  
I closed my eyes and lay back down. I wish I could just lie down here and die, I thought... Yeah, that's it... I'll just lie down here and die!  
  
Kendra got dressed and fixed her hair.  
  
Ashley and Emily were giving her compliments, and me... I was still lying down, with my eyes closed... My friends being oblivious of me...  
  
Why am I so depressed? I thought. Its not like you REALLY CARE that James Potter is dating your friend... I mean, its not like you EVER had any feelings for him...   
But I do care, I thought stubbornly, fighting with my myself. For some reason... I do...   
You pushed away when he kissed you... He was trying to kiss you! I screamed to myself. And you pushed him away... Because it felt... weird... I thought. Unreal, like in a dream...   
  
Oh who cares? I thought helplessly. Its over, it didn't even start... He's going out with Kendra, and he'll probably fall in love with her and they'll get married and have kids and you'll be called "Aunt Lily".  
  
"James!" Kendra shrieked.  
  
What about him? I thought, glumly.  
  
"James what are you doing here? You're not supposed to be here! Its against the rules!" Kendra shrieked.  
  
"Do you mind if I brought the guys?" James asked.  
  
James's voice... I thought. Why was I hearing his voice?  
  
"What's with Evans?" James asked, a hint of amusement in her voice. "Is she taking a wittle' nap?"  
  
"I dunno, she just closed her eyes and she probably fell asleep," Kendra said. I could feel everyone's eyes on me.  
  
"Maybe we should make her a surprise before she wakes up," Sirius's mischievious voice said.  
  
Oh God, I thought. But I remained with my eyes closed.  
  
"What do you say, Remus? You up for a nice prank?" Sirius asked.  
  
"On Lily?" Remus asked, a hint of fear in his voice.  
  
That's right, I thought smugly. Go ahead Sirius, and when I get up you're going to be a dead man.  
  
Sirius gave an exasperated sigh, "Please Remus!" He said. "Don't tell me that you're scared of one of Lily's temper tantrums.  
  
I had had enough.  
  
"Temper tantrums!" I cried shrilly. I sat up, glaring.  
  
  
James's POV:  
Damn it, I thought. I had been studying Lily, as she had lyed there, looking as beautiful as ever. No, James. Don't you dare! I thought. You can't be thinking sbout Lily, let alone any other girl besides Kendra as you go on this date. It isn't right.  
  
Sirius glanced at me, with pursed lips. He had his 'whoops' expression.  
  
I covered my mouth to hide a snort.  
  
Lily's legs swung off the bed... I couldn't help noticing how incredibly long her legs were... She was wearing a black mini-skrit and a blouse, with her robes open in the front.  
  
"How dare you," Lily said as she stood up, hands on her hips. "Temper tantrums?!"  
  
"Uhhh... Lily, look, it was just a joke," Sirius said, holding up his hands. "You know me, not living up to my name... Haha, you get it? Sirius?"  
  
Lily scowled.  
  
Sirius's smile froze in place.  
  
"Ah well, Kendra, why don't we go," I said, breaking the silence.  
  
Kendra nodded, looking worredly at Sirius and Lily.  
  
I led Kendra out of the room then turned around just in time to see Lily wrestle poor Sirius to the ground. I laughed and closed the door behind me.  
  
"Well, shall we?" I asked Kendra.  
  
She frowned, "I still don't see how we're going to get to Hogsmeade without permission."  
  
I grinned, "We don't need permission to get to Hogsmeade."  
  
"Oh, really?" Kendra asked mockingly. "Then how do you expect to get to Hogsmeade? What we'll just float out the doors and hope that no one will see us?- Right."  
  
"Sort of," I replied.  
  
Kendra gave me a confused look.  
  
I grinned and pulled out something. It was a silver cape that was weightless.  
  
Kendra gasped, "Is that- Is that what I think it is?"  
  
I grinned, "What do you think it is?"  
  
"Is it an Invisibility Cloak?" She asked.  
  
I was about to reply when I heard a squeal come from the dorm room. I turned sharply in the door's direction.  
  
"That sounded like Lily," I said.  
  
Kendra grinned, "I bet Sirius is kicking Lily's ass."  
  
I looked at her in horror, "Sirius... Kicking Lily's ass?" I asked.  
  
Oh God, poor Lily, I thought. And I've always appreciated her nice ass, too. (A/N: LOL! Sorry, just had to put that...)  
  
Kendra noticed my expression, "What James? I was just kidding you know."  
  
"Huh? Oh, oh yeah, I know- You were just kidding... Yeah," I said nodding. I kept staring at the door.  
  
Kendra looked at me pointedly, "Well, are we going or what?"  
  
"Uhhh... Yeah, sure. Let's go," I said, putting the cloak over the two of us.  
  
I told Kendra to close her eyes and led her out of the Gryffindor tower and to the statue of the witch. (A/N: Wait, is that right?)  
  
  
Lily's POV:  
"Ow ow ow OW!" I cired under Sirius's grip.  
  
"You give?" Sirius asked, grinning.  
  
I rolled my eyes and grunted a reply. Sirius took it as a yes and let go of my wrist. I sighed with relief and grasped my aching wrist.  
  
Ashley and Emily were sitting on my bed looking stunned.  
  
Remus and Peter were grinning like idiots.  
  
"Get (pant) out," I panted.  
  
"Awww... C'mon Lils! It was just a joke..." Sirius said, smiling.  
  
"Get out!" I exclaimed.  
  
Sirius chuckled and put an arm around me, "Aww! Poor Lily! Gets mad cause' she got beat up by a BOY," he teased.  
  
I elbowed him hard in the ribs.  
  
"Oof!"  
  
Remus laughed.  
  
Sirius sat down next to Ashley on the bed, "So what's up?"  
  
Remus looked out the door, "I wonder what James and Kendra are doing right now..."  
  
"Probably snogging with MY robes," I muttered.  
  
Sirius grinned as if an idea just occured in his head, which was impossible. "Well, there's only one way to find out what they're doing..."  
  
"What?" Peter asked.  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes, "We go after them!"  
  
Remus rubbed his hands together excitedly, "Oh! This should be good. We're going on one of our adventures eh?"  
  
Sirius nodded, "We're going on the biggest adventure of them all..."  
  
"Potter's date?" I asked, sarcastically.  
  
Sirius nodded, "Mhmm. Anyone else want to tag along?"  
  
Ashley and Emily got off the bed. Remus was already out the door. Peter looked from me to Sirius then turned and followed Remus. Ashley and Emily were next. Sirius stayed back to look at me.  
  
"You coming Lil'?" Sirius asked.  
  
"Are you insane? Go to wherever James went with Kendra? Why the bloody hell would I want to spy on them?!"  
  
Sirius shrugged, "I dunno... I just thought you'd want to know what James did with his dates... You know, just in case sometime in the future, you'll be one of them..."  
  
I glared at him, "That wasn't funny," I said, restraining myself from lunging at his neck and strangling him.  
  
Sirius laughed, "Oh yes it was." He turned and walked out of the dorm.  
  
I groaned as he left and looked around the room for something to hit, or destroy... Maybe Kendra had a picture with James AND Sirius...  
  
But, I couldn't find anything, and I soon got bored...  
  
  
  
James's POV:  
"How did we... Where did we... What?!" Kendra exclaimed as I led her to a table in the Three Broomsticks.  
  
"It was magic," I said, giving her a line that I've given to a few other girls like her.  
  
Kendra giggled.  
  
"I'm going to get us some butterbeers, okay?" I asked.  
  
She nodded and I left to go to Madame Rosmerta.  
  
  
Kendra's POV:  
I sighed and looked around in wonderment. How did we get here, I thought. Well, it didin't matter, as long as I was here with James... But my thoughts went from James to Lily... Why had she been so annoyed that I had asked for her robes? Did it have something to do with James?  
  
I laughed at the idea... right, Lily having feelings for James...  
  
James returned with two butterbeers and I sipped it slowly.  
  
"So..." James said, grinning at me.  
  
"So..." I chorused. "Um, well, how did the detention go with Lily the other night? Did you have a sponge fight or something?" I laughed, uncertainly.  
  
James's eyes suddenly had a far-away look to them, "Hmmm, the detention? Well, it wasn't so bad..."  
  
"Oh," I muttered.  
  
"Lily taught me how to wash dishes the Muggle way... I broke a plate," he said sheepishly.  
  
I laughed.  
********  
  
Sirius's POV:  
Remus yawned.  
  
"We've been here for over an hour... James isn't doing his moves," Remus said.  
  
"His moves?" Ashley asked, with raised eyebrows.  
  
I nodded, "Yup... God, I never knew James could be so BORING! All they're talking about is the usual boring crap... Hogwarts, Quidditch... Hogwarts..."  
  
Peter snorted with laughter.  
  
Emily gave him a disgusted look.  
  
"Lily, what do you think about Quidditch?" James asked.  
  
I yawned.  
  
"Wait a minute," Emily said suddenly. "I've just noticed... That's the 3rd time, he's called her Lily."  
  
"What?!" I exclaimed, my eyes widening. I looked over at James from our hiding spot under a table. Kendra was frowning.  
  
"James," she said slowly. "That's the 3rd time you've called me Lily," she said.  
  
"Huh?" James asked. His eyes widened in alarm, "Oh God..."  
  
"So, what's Potter doing?" A voice asked from behind me.  
  
I turned around, "Lily! What took you so long?"  
  
Lily shrugged, "I had to get permission to go to Hogsmeade for a project- McGonangal was nice enough not to ask TOO MUCH questions... So what's been going on?"  
  
We gave eachother looks, then I looked up.  
  
"Nothing much," I said, smiling.  
  
"What?" Lily asked, frowning.  
  
  
Lily's POV:  
'Nothing much' I thought. How can that be possible? And why was Sirius smiling like an idiot and everyone else avoiding my eyes?  
  
I bit my lip... Whatever it was, I was going to find out.  
  
"What is it?" I demanded.  
  
Remus shook his head, "Nothing."  
  
I looked over at James and Kendra- nothing out of the ordinary.I frowned, what was going on? I rolled my eyes and plopped down under the table.  
  
James and Kendra were getting up. Was the date over?  
  
"Is it over?" I whispered.  
  
Remus shrugged, "I guess so."  
  
Sirius grinned, "Let's see if he gives her a goodbye kiss."  
  
We slowly made our way from under the table and followed them out the door. They were in front of the Three Broomsticks, talking quietly.  
  
I couldn't hear them.  
  
Suddenly, James pulled Kendra to him and kissed her. She stood stunned, but then pulled him back for another kiss.  
  
Sirius looked over at me to see my reaction but I turned away from him. Away from James and Kendra...  
  
"Lily!" Ashley exclaimed softly. "You're crying."  
  
"I am?" I asked, frowning. "Ugh!" I groaned and wiped them away angrily. "Must be the wind," I muttered. "I'm going back," I said and walked away.  
**********  
  
James's POV:  
"Um, so, I was wondering... Would you like to go to the Halloween Ball with me?" I asked Kendra as we stopped outside her room.  
  
Kendra smiled happily, "Sure."  
  
"Great," I said softly. "Okay, well, see ya later."  
  
"See you," she said, and walked into her dorm.   
  
I glanced in and saw Lily on her bed, face down on her bed.  
  
"What's wrong Lily?" I heard Kendra say before the door closed quietly.  
  
Damn, I thought. What was wrong with Evans?  
  
I went down to the Common Room and Sirius immediatley pounced me with questions.  
  
"So, how was the date, Prongs?" He asked.  
  
I shrugged, "It was good. Why?"  
  
Sirius grinned, "I bet it was good."  
  
Remus nudged him.  
  
"What do you mean by that?" I demanded.  
  
Sirius shrugged, still grinning.  
  
I turned to Peter who was cowering on his bed. Peter could never keep his mouth shut for too long...  
  
"Peter..." I said slowly.  
  
Peter squeaked.  
  
"Where were you during my date?" I asked.  
  
Peter covered his mouth with his hands.  
  
I rolled my eyes, "Don't make me put a spell on you, Peter," I said.  
  
Peter reluctantly took his hands off his mouth, "We were... We were under a table in the Three Broomsticks," he said.  
  
"Who's 'we'?" I asked.  
  
Peter glanced at Sirius uneasily who was still grinning.  
  
"Us, and Lily's friends."  
  
My eyes narrowed, "Was Lily there?" I asked, my voice barely a whisper.  
  
"Yupperee do- Lily, was there," Sirius answered for him.  
  
I hit Sirius, "What'd you bring her along for?"  
  
Sirius shrugged.  
  
Remus pursed his lips and girnned teasingly, "Besides James- I thought you didn't like Lily."  
  
"I DON'T!" I said hotly. "How many times do I have to tell you? I just don't want her watching my dates with her friend."  
  
"So are you going with her to the ball?" Sirius asked.  
  
"Of course," I said.  
  
Sirius grinned teasingly, "I didn't say who," he said.  
  
"Oh shut up!" I said.  
  
  
  
Lily's POV:  
I sighed as Kendra, Ashley, and Emily dragged me down to the Common Room.  
  
"Let's play Wizard Chess," Emily suggested.  
  
I sighed.  
  
"C'mon Lily. Spill, why are you so down?" Kendra demanded.  
  
"Nothing," I muttered. 'There;s nothing to spill."  
  
We walked to a table with a chess set on it.  
  
Emily sat down on a chair. Ashley pushed me to the opposite chair. I looked up to find James coming to our table.  
  
I groaned.  
  
Kendra looked up and grinned, "Hi James."  
  
"Hi," he said. "Um, can I speak to Evans- ALONE."  
  
Kendra shrugged, "Sure."  
  
The three of the left.  
  
"What?" I asked.  
  
"I don't get what your problem is, Evans," James snapped, sitting down on the chair across from me.  
  
"I have a problem?" I asked.  
  
"No sane person would spy on someone on their date. Why were you spying on me?" He demanded. "Tell me!"  
  
I was speechless... Why had I spied on him?  
  
"I..." I trailed off.  
  
"I find it very odd for a person that declared in 3rd year that I was the lowest person alive- to start spying on me," James said, glaring.  
  
"Well I-" I started, but James cut me off.  
  
"And after our argument yesterday, I thought you would want to have NOTHING to do with me," James said.  
  
"But I-"  
  
"And you know what Evans? I'm sick of you too. Ever since 1st year, I've thought you were a bitch," James said.  
  
"Now wait just a minute-" I demanded.  
  
"No, YOU wait Evans," James said. "I don't get why you were making a big deal out of me going out with Kendra. For one thing- When we kissed, you pushed me away. So, what? Am I supposed to think that you're going to think of it as something when YOU'RE the one that pushed me away. You've got to have some mental problems to think that. And you've got to be kidding if you ever thought I'd have feelings for you. You wanna know what I think of you Evans? I think you're a selfish, spoiled brat, and you can go to-"  
  
Out of nowhere, my hand flew and hit the side of his face. When my hand and met his skin, I gasped and dropped it.  
  
I stood there calmly as James glared at me.  
  
"Go to hell, James," I said softly, then walked calmly up the stairs to the girls' dormitory.  
  
  
A/N: WHOO! Wow... I thought I'd give James a chance to speak his mind... Of course I think he got carried away... Or maybe that was my hands fault... AHHH!   
Well, as my characters get a 5 minute break, I think James is cursing me as he throws up somewhere... (Like Ryan Philippe in "Cruel Intentions") AWWW! He's cursing me because he didn't like saying those mean words to Lily...  
  
I'm sorry, I'm a little hyper right now...  
  
But please review! Please~please~please! 


	7. Doin' Some Thinking

A/N: Hee hee hee hee. I think this may be one of the funniest chapters in this fic... At least I think so... Well, that's me- I think some things are funny and I end up being the ONLY ONE that does. But whatever.  
  
  
Never Going to Happen  
By: Jey4eva  
  
Chapter 7: Doin' Some Thinking  
  
  
Remus's POV:  
"She called me James," James whispered.  
  
"Ha ha," Sirius said.  
  
"She slapped me."  
  
"Ha ha."  
  
"She called me James."  
  
"Ha ha."  
  
"She slapped me."  
  
"Ha ha."  
  
"She called me James."  
  
"Ha ha."  
  
"She slapped-"  
  
"WE GOT IT!" I burst out, exasperated. I looked at Peter then changed my mind, "Well, I got it." I shook my head.  
  
"She slapped me," James said.  
  
"Ha ha," Sirius repeated.  
  
(A/N: I guess that's where the funny part ends.)  
  
I rolled my eyes and threw my hands up in the air.   
  
We were in our dorm room, sitting on our beds. For past 15 minutes... Sirius had been showing us his wide vocabulary. And James was still in shock by what had happened and kept repeating the same 2 lines. It was getting irritating.  
  
"Moony!" James exclaimed. "Did you hear her? She called me JAMES!"  
  
"Yeah, I heard her," I muttered.  
  
James turned to Peter, "Did YOU see her? She slapped me! ME!"  
  
Peter nodded vaguely, looking confused.  
  
James tilted his head to the side. His eyes got that glazed look.  
  
"I called her a bitch," he whispered.  
  
"You like her," Sirius said in a sing-song voice.  
  
I groaned and put a pillow over my head.  
  
  
  
Lily's POV:  
I sniffled. "That bastard," I said into my pillow. "How dare he," I said sniffling again.  
  
"Lily! Let us IN! Its our dorm room too!" Kendra said from outside the door. I had locked the door and put a bunch of other locks on it, too.  
  
I ignored her.  
  
"Alohomora!"  
  
Bang!  
  
I looked up. Kendra, Ashley, and Emily were standing at the door way. Emily's wand was in her hand.  
  
"Why didn't I think of that?" Kendra asked, slapping her own face.  
  
"Go AWAY!" I whined.  
  
"No," Kendra said, defiantly.  
  
"Ugh!" I exclaimed and pulled the curtains around my bed.  
  
"I assume you want to be left alone?" Kendra asked.  
  
"YES!" I exclaimed.  
  
The curtains were pushed aside, "Why?" Kendra asked, brow furrowing.  
  
"Don't you want to talk about it?" Ashley asked.  
  
I shook my head.  
  
"Aw! C'mon Lily! Everyone heard you and James," Kendra said.  
  
When I burst out crying she looked at me sheepishly.  
  
"I wasn't supposed to say that, was I?" She said.  
  
Ashley and Emily glared at her, then turned back to me.  
  
"If it makes you feel any better... I think your handprint is going to leave a mark on James for awhile," Emily said, grinning.  
  
"It makes me feel worse!" I exclaimed.  
  
"Why?" Ashley asked.  
  
I shurgged, "I don't know."  
  
"I know," Kendra said excitedly. "You LIKE him."  
  
"I DO NOT!" I shouted.  
  
"You do to," she replied.  
  
"He's annoying. He's a stupid, slimy git," I said, shaking my head.  
  
"Well then he's YOUR stupid slimy git," Kendra said, crossing her arms. "I suppose now, I have to find a different date to go to the Halloween Ball with me, eh?"  
  
"NO!" I exclaimed.  
  
Kendra giggled, "You can deny it all you want, Lily. I KNOW you like him."  
  
"I don't, and I wish you would just DROP the bloody damn subject," I said hotly. My face was starting to heat up. Must have been... the heat?  
  
"You're blushing," Kendra teased.  
  
"Kendra, shut up!" Ashley hissed.  
  
"You should have seen him, Lil'," Kendra said, ignoring her. "After you ran off, he touched his face like he was never going to wash it off AGAIN!"  
  
I groaned, "I really don't care Kendra. He probably was thinking it was going to leave a scar and that he'll never have another date again."  
  
Kendra snorted, "Right."  
  
Emily smiled, "I agree with Kendra. He looked like he was going to burst into tears when you ran off."  
  
"I don't care! I'm NOT listening!" I shouted over them, covering my ears. "La la la la la."  
  
Kendra rolled her eyes.  
  
I dropped my hands, "Besides, he had no right to say those things to me..." It suddenly occured to me that he may be right. "Am I really a selfish spoiled brat?" I lowered my voice to barely a whisper, "Am I a bitch?" I asked tearfully.  
  
"NO! Of course NOT!" They exclaimed.  
  
"Well, if James said it, then maybe I really am," I said.  
  
They shook their heads furiously, "No Lily. No way."  
  
"James didn't mean it. He was probably too angry to realize what he was saying," Emily said.  
  
"He looked like he meant EVERY SINGLE WORD he said," I stated. "And you know what? Maybe he's right..." I said.  
  
  
  
James's POV:  
I was in hell. I just couldn't shake off the fact that Lily had slapped me. That I had yelled things I didn't really mean. And most of all... I couldn't BELIEVE that she had called me James... My REAL name. Not Potter... She had been calling me Potter ever since she found out what my name was.  
  
I was going CRAZY!  
  
Sirius was another reason that was driving me nuts.  
  
I glared at him.  
  
"James you're an idiot," he stated.  
  
"No kidding," I said.  
  
"You made Lily upset," he stated.  
  
"I KNOW!" I snapped.  
  
"She probably hates you," he addded.  
  
"Don't you think I know that?" I snapped again. I massaged my temples. "I'm getting a headache," I muttered.  
  
Remus had given up on us and was sleeping peacefully on his bed. Peter had busied himself with homework, ever so often glancing at us and frowning.  
  
"Ha ha," Sirius said tonelessly. I guess he was starting to get bored.  
  
I rolled my eyes.  
  
"I'm going to bed," Sirius announced. He took his hand and with a flick of it put out the candles.  
  
"Sirius!" Peter shouted.  
  
"What is it?" Sirius asked.  
  
I rolled my eyes again and lit the candles.  
  
"Thank you," Peter said.  
  
Sirius yawned and jumped into his bed. He put his night cap on and went to sleep.  
  
I shook my head. I didn't understand him. Sirius never changed out of his robes. Sometimes he'd wear the same robes twice in a row.  
  
"I'm going to bed, too," Peter said.  
  
I merely nodded. I changed into Quidditch pajamas and put out the candles. I lay there, staring up to the ceiling lost in thought. Lily was DEFINETELY not going ot get over what I said in one day... She would SURELY be in a sour mood tomorrow.  
  
"I better apologize," I muttered. Then frowned, surprised at myself. I had never apologized to a girl in my life... I shook my head. Ever since I met Lily, she's been making me do crazy things.  
  
  
  
Lily's POV:  
James is dead, I thought numbly as I lay wide awake. Kendra, Ashley, and Emily had gone to bed... But not me. No, I was wide awake and alert.  
  
I couldn't help the thoughts of James being right getting the better of me... I mean, REALLY! What if he was right? I mean, I'll admit, I'm no angelic angel...  
  
I sighed and turned onto my side and stared at the wall.  
  
"I should change," I said softly. Maybe I could try to be a bit nicer to people, I thought. Especially James...  
  
I sighed and closed my eyes.  
  
It was amazing how much effect James's hurtful words were having on me, I thought sleepily. I'd think more about it tomorrow...  
  
  
A/N: Yeah, that's about it. There's not really much point to this chapter. Its just showing the aftermath of James's outburst... I promise that the next chapter will be more intersting... I hope anyway...  
  
  



	8. Changes

A/N: R&R okay?  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Lily, James, Sirius, Remus, Peter *breathe* and that's about it I think...  
  
  
Never Going to Happen  
By: Jey4eva  
  
Chapter 8: Changes  
  
James's POV:  
I came down the stairs preparing for the worst... I closed my eyes as I reached the bottom of the stairs.  
  
"Y'know James, you can trip by walking down the stairs like that," Sirius's teasing voice boomed in.  
  
I opened my eyes, "Shut up," I snapped. I looked around, "Where's Lily?" I asked.  
  
"Probably asking Professor McGonagall if there are homeless wizards," Sirius replied, grinning.  
  
"What?" I asked. "What are you talking about?"  
  
Sirius shook his head, "I think you really messed her up, James."  
  
"Why would she be..." I trailed off as Lily came into the Common Room. She looked over at us and was walking towards us right now.  
  
"Oh God..." I whispered. What was she going to do? Was she capable of murder?  
  
"Have fun, Jamesie!" Sirius said, giving my back a slap. He walked away.  
  
I turned to Lily.  
  
"James," she said.  
  
"Hi Lily," I replied. I was startled. That was the first time I had EVER called her by her first name.  
  
"Look James-"  
  
"Look Lily-"  
  
We laughed awkwardly, "You go first," I said.  
  
"No you can."  
  
"No I want you to," I said firmly.  
  
"Okaaay," Lily said. She took a deep breath, "Well James... After yesterday... I sort of... Thought about what you said," she said.  
  
"Lily, about that. I wasn't-" I started.  
  
"No wait. And you know what? You're exactly right. I AM a selfish, spoiled bitch," she said, lowering her head at the word.  
  
"No, Lily, I wasn't thinking when I-"  
  
"So I've decided to change," she interrupted.  
  
"You've decided to what?" I exclaimed.  
  
"I asked Professor McGonagall if there are any homeless wizards and witches and she said no, but I can take care of other people... Or elves... You know? Like house elves!" She said, excitedly. "Like the ones that don't have a family to work for... Wait, that's not right. House elves have to serve people and they don't expect anything in return- why, that's-that's wrong! Hmmm... I have to go!" She said, already climbing into the Portrait Hole. "See ya!"  
  
"But-" I started.  
  
She was gone.  
  
"Shoot," I muttered.  
  
"What'd you do to her, James?" Ashley asked, passing by me and hurrying after Lily.  
  
"I honestly don't know," I mumbled.  
  
I sat down on a chair where Remus and Sirius were in the middle of a chess match.  
  
"What's she say, Prongs?" Sirius asked.  
  
"She's going to help house elves get free rights," I said, shaking my head.  
  
"Really?" Remus asked, snorting. "Doesn't she know that house elves LIKE to serve?"  
  
I shrugged, "That's not really important because... I don't know how Lily got this way... I mean, she was saying that-" I lowered my voice. "That I was right when I called her a selfish, spoiled bitch."  
  
"Wow! You have guts Prongs," Sirius said, grinning and turning to me.  
  
"Well, I didn't exactly put it THAT way," I said defensively.  
  
"Right," Sirius snorted.  
  
Peter was staring at me interestedly, "Why do house elves like to serve?" He asked.  
  
"I have no idea," I said sighing. "I think what I said, has caused Lily to think down on herself, so she's decided to change."  
  
"Well then you should tell her that she isn't a selfish, spoiled bitch and that you're a stupid, spineless bastard," Sirius said, brightly.  
  
"Thanks a lot," I muttered.  
  
"Glad to help," Sirius replied, smiling.  
  
I sighed and got lost in my thoughts... Lily changed because of what I had said... So did that mean I had to change?  
  
  
  
Lily's POV:  
"But Professor Dumbledore, I don't think its right that house elves don't get any payments for the work they do. And they don't get vacations! I mean, they're... well, they're not exactly people, but they have feelings! Why can't you udnerstand that?" I demanded.  
  
"Lily," Dumbledore said calmly. "I don't mean to be rude, but house elves like to work. The meer thought of them being paid for what they do makes them horrified. Not that I think its fair," he said hastily when I opened her mouth to argue. "But if I tried to pay the house elves, they would object and not accept it. It makes them feel insulted, Lily."  
  
"But Professor, I just wish that they would be given equal rights- At Hogwarts at least. They can still work... But they should be rewarded for all the work they do," I replied.  
  
"I understand where you're coming from, Lily..." Dumbledore trailed off and stroked his silver beard in thought. "Lily, have you ever been to the kitchen?"  
  
"Well, yes. Sort of though," I replied.  
  
"Sort of?" He inquired.  
  
"I spent detention there," I replied quickly.  
  
"Ah, I see... So you haven't really seen house elves at work, eh?" He asked.  
  
"No, I haven't," I replied.  
  
"Well, you're friends with James Potter, am I right?" He asked.  
  
"Well, I wouldn't say FRIENDS," I said giving a laugh.  
  
Dumbledore shrugged, "Just ask Mr. Potter- Or Mr. Black if you wish, how to get to the kitchen. I'm sure they know the way by heart and would be happy to share it with you."  
  
"Um, okay..." I trailed off.  
  
Dumbledore nodded and stood up, "Well, you have a breakfast to catch- Then I suppose classes..."  
  
I nodded, "Yes, Professor. Thank you." I let myself out.  
  
I sighed.  
  
Ashley and Emily were waiting outside.  
  
"What did you DO?" Ashley whispered.  
  
I shrugged, "I tried to convince Dumbledore to give house elves equal rights- But he just told me to have a visit to the kitchen." I huffed, "I'm sure that I will find little slaves." I made a disgusted face, "And to think that I thought Hogwarts was a fair school..."  
  
"Aw, Lily! C'mon, it can't be that bad!" Emily said.  
  
"Well, it is," I snapped. I looked around, "Where's Kendra?"  
  
They shrugged, "At the Great Hall probably," Emily said.  
  
"We should eat breakfast now, or we'll be late for our classes," Ashley said.  
  
I nodded, "Then tonight, I'll ask James to help me get to the kitchen. I swear, Hogwarts needs some changes done around here. I can't believe we have slaves caring for our every single need!"  
  
"But you already knew that house elves worked here!" Emily exclaimed as we walked to the Great Hall.  
  
"Yeah, well I didn't know that they did EVERYTHING!" I snapped. "We need to make changes."  
  
I nodded to myself, and I'm just the one to make them, I thought.  
  
  
A/N: Okay, Lily has changed. She's sort of like Hermione, I know. But whatever. I wonder what's gonna happen tonight... Please review! 


End file.
